Gut feelings....

I dont know what happened but I woke up feeling absolutely terrified on Wednesday morning. I dreamt my ex Alex was dead and the police were phoning to tell me as my number was the only number on his phone.

It scared me. I lay in bed , breathing deeply to calm myself. It seemed so real, so completely life like - my hand was even in the position of holding a phone as the reality must of triggered my real life reactions and muscles.

I blinked, let the sun in and took in my room around me, realising that I was safe and in my bed, the whole experience had been a terrible dream - but there was a sickening feeling in my stomach that something had happened to Alex.

Me and Alex lost contact a year ago to the weekend, we decided that both of us too erratic were unhealthy for eachother , a combination of 2 voliatile acids would never end well and so we parted.

I couldnt shake the feeling, that something had happened, I dialled his numbers - notoriously london, he had 3 numbers - I dont know what they were all for but this is Alex ,nothing is simple in his life, all 3 numbers had a long, dead dial town.

The longer the day ticked on, the worse the feeling of anxiety got. I was beginning to think, maybe my dream had been symbolic of a real life moment.

I decided it was time to find him....